Captain Commando: In The Buff
by stardust2002
Summary: Another adventure for Captain Commando.  Is Lee losing his mind, or just his clothes?  LK, humour romance. No spoilers.


_** Captain Commando: In The Buff **_

Lee rubbed his head vigorously with the towel till all his hair stood on end. He raked his fingers through it, noting it hadn't been cut in a while and that it wasn't looking too shabby at it's current length. In fact he rather liked it. _I wonder if Kara likes it this way?_ he thought, sizing himself up in the mirror.

It had been a weeksince their relationship had taken a dive into something deeper and much more physical. He'd never been happier. Neither had she, by the looks of things. She'd grinned from ear to ear every time he saw her and she'd taken to doing even more daring stunts than usual when they were out in the heavens together. He knew it was because of the newfound joy she'd found in living - he felt the same way - but his father hadn't been impressed by her increasingly reckless behaviour. He'd been so unimpressed in fact that he'd thrown her in the brig for forty-eight hours after nearly knocking the wing clean off one of the nugget's ships during a training run.

She hadn't argued it. In fact she'd smiled all the way there.

Lee would have protested but he didn't want to have to explain to his father why he was suddenly in Kara's court when she was breaking the rules. He missed her though. In fact life was just a little dull with her gone.

He slung the towel around his hips and knotted it, reaching over to where he'd left his clothes ten minutes earlier.

They weren't there.

A frown creased his forehead. He peeked under the bench, figuring they'd fallen down while he'd been showering. No luck. The frown deepened. Where could they be? He began a full search of the head - thankfully empty, a feeling that something odd was going on beginning to form in the pit of his stomach.

Ten minutes later he'd moved through mystified, past irked and had reached full-blown irritation and frustration. His clothes were nowhere to be found!

Something was fishy. Clothes didn't just up and walk away on their own. Not clean ones anyway. He put his mind to work. If clothes couldn't disappear into thin air or walk away on their own it meant there was only one explanation for what had happened.

Someone had removed them.

His mind flew instantly to Kara. Who else would do something that annoying? Granted she liked seeing him in the buff (she'd admitted it the previous night, accompanied by a large, lecherous smile) and she was the only person who was a constant pain in his ass with her tricks and practical jokes, but she was unavailable - comfortably ensconced in the ship's holding cell. He could cross her off the list.

Well who else did that leave?

Reason told him it the list of people who might want to see him in the nude was pretty short - the female crew members and possibly a few questionable males.

Racetrack? Nah, she liked to joke around but she only had eyes for Hotdog.

Dee? She'd been eyeing him rather appreciatively of late, despite being obviously involved with Billy. She probably thought she was being discreet and that Lee hadn't noticed. He had, though he'd tried not to show it. That usually gave women the idea he was interested as well, which he wasn't.

There was only one woman he had eyes for.

Ellen Tigh? She was pretty flagrantly sexual about her advances on him. But she'd have been waiting in the showers, likely in nothing but her birthday suit as well. Wasting time on foreplay wasn't her style.

So who?

Gaeta? He'd always wondered about Felix ...

Who else could there be? There was that nugget in Kara's class, the one with the blonde hair and blue eyes. Mc Cain? That was his name. He'd been awfully friendly but Lee had just thought he'd been sucking up. Wouldn't be the first time people had looked to the Commander's son to put in a good word for them. Maybe McCain had had an ulterior motive for hanging around ...

Lee shuddered distastefully. That sort of thing had never appealed to him. He liked women,_ woman, _pure and simple.

He sighed. As interesting as it was, all this speculating wasn't getting him any closer to his clothes. _ Captain Commando indeed!_ he thought with a wry chuckle._ If only I had some superpower like being able to become invisible right now!_

He checked the knot on his towel again, making sure it was secure. If walking through the ship's corridors in nothing but a towel was against regs, surely walking through them buck naked would earn him a severe punishment. He didn't want to find out what it was.

His father would not be amused.

He prayed he'd make it to the bunkroom without running into anyone. Unlikely but possible. Stranger things had happened to him lately after all.

Upon rounding the first corner he nearly ran into Chief Tyrol. _ Frak!_ The Chief stopped and looked him up and down, eyes saying more in two seconds than a whole novel could have.

"New uniforms sir? They're a bit revealing don't you think?"

Lee bit his lip, containing the sarcastic response that had sprung forth immediately. "Someone stole my clothes while I was in the shower," he said carefully, struggling to keep his voice even. It was hard as the humour in the situation lit up Tyrol's brown eyes with merriment. "I'd appreciate it if you'd keep this little incident to yourself," Lee said, a note of desperation his voice.

"Yes sir," Tyrol said, trying not to smile.

Lee rolled his eyes as he continued, hoping the Chief would be as good as his word. _Please don't let me run into anyone else!_ he begged silently of the Gods. But apparently Apollo was out of favour with the others because who should cross his path two turns from his destination but Colonel Tigh, the last person on the ship he'd wanted to see!

"Captain Adama!" Tigh said loudly, coming to a stop in front of him. "What the hell do you think you're doing? This is a ship not a frakking brothel!"

"Yes sir, I know sir," Lee began, trying to hold his temper. It was hard; Tigh always irritated him to no end.

"You should know better than to walk around the ship dressed like that!"

"I do sir," Lee tried again.

"You're the son of the Commander, you should be setting an example for the rest of the crew! Trust you not to not care about protocol. You're no better than Starbuck! Turn around and march straight to the brig Captain. You're serving forty-eight hours for indecent exposure and breaking the dress code."

As Tigh spit out the last words Lee had a revelation - Kara _was_ behind this. She'd bribed someone to steal his clothes so he'd end up in the brig with her!

He stopped arguing and turned around meekly, anger dissipating as amusement took it's place.

As the hatch to the brig swung open, Kara's head turned towards him. She beamed as Tigh escorted him in.

"What's a good-looking guy like you doing in a place like this?" she asked, just a hint of seductiveness in her voice. She backed away from the bars as Tigh opened the door and locked it behind Lee. He folded his arms over his chest and waited till Tigh left.

"Gee, I don't know Kara. I was just showering and suddenly here I am, locked up through no fault of my own. I don't suppose _you_ would have any idea how that happened, would you?" He was trying to be stern but a smile kept pulling his lips upwards.

She advanced on him and put her hands on his chest, pushing his arms away. "Nope, no idea whatsoever." She grinned like a Chesire cat. "I was just praying for some sexy buff guy to appear magically so I'd have some company down here."

He slid his arms around her waist and pulled her close. "Well I guess this is your lucky day then isn't it?"

"Lucky two days if I recall correctly," she said, cheeky grin lighting up her eyes. "And the guard is away for breakfast now."

"I think your day just got luckier," Lee said, not even noticing as the towel slipped to the floor between them as he kissed her.

"Mmm," she said a few minutes later as she broke off the kiss to breathe. "Captain Commando, just the way I like him. In the buff."

_** fin **_


End file.
